I thought I’d have a go at doing video blogs!!

So here’s my very first, and hopefully not the last!

Here’s the transcript for your reading pleasure.

The mental health dilemma

“Mental health” has become one of the hottest topics in the world!

There’s little doubt that there are more suicides, greater rates of depression and related issues than any time in recorded history.

Our advances in psychiatry, neurology and related disciplines, has led the way to an incredible depth of understanding around how the mind works at every level. We are learning more about the mechanics of the brain almost daily.

We know for sure that the stresses of the modern world put pressures on us that we simply are not built to handle.

On the other hand, chronically stressful situations (trauma, abuse, war, disease etc) have been part of the human condition since day one, so it’s nothing new.

So are all our new understandings and treatments actually helping?

Good question! And I am yet to find any empirical research on this – assuming it’s even possible to research in the first place.

Personally, I’ve battled with mental health issues all my life – relating to being gay and having ADHD. But these specific issues (and countless others) have only been regarded as problems in more recent times.

There has always been LGBT+ people, and historically, it’s never been regarded as a mental health problem until the advent of psychiatry! Sure, it’s been treated in many weird and wonderful ways, but never in terms of a mental issue that had to be cured.

The same goes for ADHD, even more so! Historically, there were simply people who thought and interacted with the world differently. There wasn’t anything wrong with them, they were just different, usually more creative and eccentric, and were generally given the space to be what they were.

But now, we are so obsessed with creating “normal” people that we apply labels to anything that doesn’t fit this magical “normal” and then do everything we can to fix it.

In our efforts to understand, we’ve created an obsession. Those who don’t fit “normal” become fearful that our labels won’t allow us to function in society – that we’ll be rejected and alienated. We are encouraged to seek help that will somehow make our brains work the same as everyone else’s, building a background of shame that brings even more problems.

I’m not dissing modern psychology and neuro science at all. But I am saying that we’ve created an unreal and destructive precedent.

One of the single most important factors I’ve found when helping others (most notably with LGBT and Neuro-diverse issues) is letting them know they aren’t broken and don’t need fixing.

When this sinks in, it empowers us to make conscious decisions around how much we really want to fit in, and how much we want to simply be how we are, and let the rest of the world get used to it.

For me, finally accepting that I’m gay and that is absolutely OK, empowered me to find my niche – without having to fit into any stereotypes or expectations on either side of the issue.

The same for ADHD – it’s how my brain works. It’s wonderful and creative and allows me to see the world and life in a totally unique way. Once I accepted that (and all the implications) I was empowered to decide how much I wanted to be “normal” or whether it was fine to be me – gloriously eccentric, unorganised and creative, and let the rest of the world figure out how they should respond to that.

Of course, it’s a work in progress. I still succumb to performance anxiety, trying to meet other’s expectations. I catch myself procrastinating because of a deep sense of failure, after being told all my life I don’t do things the “right way”, which causes me to not even try.

But I’m getting better every day!

So my point is this.

Don’t get lost in the labels. Don’t allow fear and shame to drive you into a life of either constant failure and rejection, or an obsession with trying to fit in through endless therapy and drugs.

Despite all the amazing breakthroughs that mental health research has brought, we are still the masters of our own lives. We don’t have to “fit in” just because we’ve been told we have to.

Accept yourself. Be you – gloriously and messily you. And if you feel you need to seek help to function within our dysfunctional society, then that choice is yours – no on else’s!