• You’ve tried to be “straight”, in fact you’ve pleaded with God through tears of shame, fear and guilt to take away this terrible “sin”!
  • Your stomach turns to knots and you feel sick when people talk about the evils of being gay, and pray with every ounce of strength you have, that you are putting on a good “straight” face.
  • You just can’t shake the possibility that you really are an “abomination” and destined for hell!
  • You are living a silent, dual life – with a secret that is too much to share – wondering how you’ll survive.
  • You even wonder if everything you’ve believed is a lie!

The Silent Gays Project is here to help people process their sexual and gender identities and the torment they suffer in their faith by providing the freedom and security to question everything, including their entire belief system, without fear.

Unlike Christian LGBT support groups we provide resources and spaces to explore sexuality, gender AND religious belief systems.

This free booklet provides succinct information about the nature of sexuality and gender, our paradigms that govern the way we view belief systems, reparative therapy and church ministry, the impact of religion on LGBT people and encouragement to find a way forward.

We want to help people recognise religious paradigms and discover their own unique identity and spiritual journey with respect, dignity and integrity. You can find us on Facebook where we post hard hitting and relevant information and updates for the community as well as promoting discussion.

There is also a “secret” Silent Gays Facebook group where members are free to share their hearts (all the pain and crap) in a safe and secure environment.

It’s not just online either. We are aiming to create a network of groups worldwide providing personal support in small groups. We also run seminars and workshops for anyone interested in understanding the nature and complexity of sexual and gender identity.

The core standards are always love, acceptance, compassion, nurture and empathy. Theology, doctrines or any specific religious beliefs are secondary to the support and unconditional love for every individual.

I have also written my autobiography “It’s Life Jim…”, covering my own journey through religion as a “silent gay”.

For inquiries and confidential help email us at
What this site is NOT

There are many groups claiming that core sexual attraction can be changed – that its possible to actually change your orientation and become “straight”.

Nearly every person who claims to now be straight through the efforts of various “healing” and reparative therapy ministries, has simply learned how to live in denial, alter external behaviour, or just lie to live up to the expectations of the ministry, church, friends and family.

This approach has caused serious psychological damage to untold numbers of fragile, hurting people, so much so, that the suicide rate amongst gay christian men is amongst the highest demographic. Exodus Ministries (the largest and highest profile ex-gay ministry to date) shut down because of this very reason.

  • This is NOT a “gay christian” service that attempts to reconcile traditional christianity with being LGBT.
  • We are NOT interested in changing your orientation.
  • We ARE however, interested in helping you understand the spiritual, emotional, physical, and social aspects of the way you are and, most importantly, help you to see how absolutely and unconditionally loved you are, just as you are.

Is homosexuality wrong?

Categorically NO! There’s heaps of info in this website to kick you off on your journey of discovery and life.God doesn't hate gays

If you are attracted to others of the same gender or confused about your gender identity, Silent Gays is here to walk alongside you to help find peace, life and love. It’s about new hope for those under the burden of religious dogma.
Ancient Greek had only two words for homosexual – arrenomanes and erastes. Neither of these words were ever used once in the bible. It’s that simple.
God doesn’t want to change your sexuality, He/she wants you to “live loved”, whatever that looks like!
We do not have all the answers, and recognise the unique journey each one of us is on. We encourage honesty with ourselves, God and each other and to live our lives with integrity, unafraid of asking the hard questions and learning from each other.

See you at the Big Gay Out!

12th Feb – 12pm to 7pm